One of the most enticing, yet deceptive demands of top communicators is to control the message.

Executives and experts alike speak about it in ways that conjure up visions of a snake charmer using semantic prowess to sway his or her mark. In real life, however, it's the snake charmer who is more likely to get bitten.

Message control today is a myth. It began as a truth, back when people accepted paternalistic communications and snappy phrases like "singing off the ...